Taking a toddler to a wedding

Little did we know POD would be in the midst of potty training when we accepted an invitation to a friend’s wedding. Given she’d made the transition to big girl pants two weeks earlier however we were full of optimism.

It was an interesting journey to the venue. A stop in a country lane highlighted a need for the absent potty as POD declined to go beside a barley field. Although it seemed she had some success at the pub we stopped at, she requested to go again just as we left the car park.

At a service station with no public facilities we were surrounded by everything from screen wash to Smarties. POD refused to go but took great joy in attempting to open nearby bottles. We didn’t stop again until we reached the venue where we discovered POD has a fear of hand dryers.

Lying on the floor in-between the door and the bar, she then pretended to be a fish. A position that doesn’t bode well for introductions or getting a drink. Following a much needed period of outdoor play, POD then busied herself with drawing and wearing her headband across her eyelids. She hardly spoke until the ceremony.

“Daddy I’m a bit bored” POD was told she could go outside afterwards.

“Hip hip hooray” It’s not finished yet, put your arms down.

A period of fidgeting, cutlery play and a falling glass shortly afterwards led to a muted Peppa Pig making an appearance.

“Oh look Mummy there’s Peppa!” Yes be really quiet though, it’s not finished.

“Mummy I escaping” And with that she left the table.

A further trip to the toilet was far more thrilling than the last. Knickers were looped around the toilet roll holder. Cries of “Well done Mummy you did a wee” were coupled with dancing and clapping.

It didn’t take POD long to work out how to unlock the door. Your toddler shouting “hello everybody” to passers by is just what you need when you’re mid pee. Attempting to close the door in four inch heels with pants restricting your movement isn’t ideal either!

After a spot of fun in the sunshine, POD was back inside for the speeches. Just before the best man began his stories, the silence was broken with our toddler shouting “Mummy I need a poo”.

We’re linking this post up with Wot So Funee? at Actually Mummy. If your children have been saying some funny things this week, you can join in below.

Wot So Funee?


  1. Hahahaaaaaaa oh noooo I know I really shouldn’t laugh because chances are Z will be doing the exact same thing soon but it made me chuckle so much. I really dread z opening the lock of the loo door and I’m always expecting him to do it and swing the door wide open!! It does sound like she’s doing really well with potty training though :)

    • I’d have chuckled just as much at your post I’m sure! I’ll keep my fingers crossed Z doesn’t work out how to use the toilet door. POD now finds it highly amusing, tried in Cote the other day. As if walking through a restaurant with a potty wasn’t embarrassing enough. She’s doing well though :)

  2. Toddlers are actually allergic to weddings… the best ones are the really long ones in churches I LOVE those with WallyBubba… makes me very thankful for the free wiiiinnnnnnnneeeee. :) #funee xx

    • It was an experience it has to be said! I *might have* exhausted the wine supplies :)

  3. Could have been worse – you could have been in spanx! 😉

    • Now that would have been interesting *snort*

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  5. Oh POD what fantastic timing you have! Especially when announcing you need a poo. I love it :)

    • She’s hilarious – I’m sure she did it on purpose. She’s a smart little cookie :)

  6. Heh heh impeccable timing POD !

  7. Love it!

    • Little tinker! Just read your troll wedding post, hilarious :)

  8. Oh, brilliant! This really made me chuckle :) The joys, huh?! I sometimes wonder why we go anywhere at all :)

    • Thanks Sara – so embarrassing at times but impeccable timing in the speeches :)

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